Dear Homegrown Yogis,
“Does anyone else feel like we’re having a collective deja vu moment, and 2021 will just be a repeat of 2020?” A fellow yoga studio owner posted this question in an online networking group, and it was met by a resounding yes followed by the saddest group of emojis you’ve ever seen. I’m not going to lie and say I’m not concerned about the rise in COVID numbers (some nights laying in bed I’ll even say I am very VERY concerned about the rise) but I know it won’t be deja vu unless I allow it to be.
I’ve noticed in my life – and you may see it in your own – that the same challenges seem to come up again and again and again. There may be a slight variation in the people involved or in the particulars of the situation, but there is always the same underlying theme and story. For me – my story is that I can never simply hit a stride in life and take some time to sit back, stop hustling and let things flow. It feels like every time I’m about to do that at the studio, we have a teacher leave or the AC breaks and it’s a thousand dollars to repair. Or that one time I thought I had hit a stride in motherhood and then Freida broke her right arm followed by breaking her left arm a month later. Yea – that was a humbling time =(
Although different details, these challenges each hit up against the same parts of me – the part of me that wants to control things that are uncontrollable; the part of me that thinks I’m not good enough so I’ll work twice as hard as everyone else; the part of me that says if I never take my guard down nothing or no one can catch me vulnerable. And yet here is where I know I am growing and evolving – the same challenges may keep showing up, and the same tender spots of my ego may be triggered, but now I’m recognizing that it’s just my old way of thinking showing up again and I’m choosing to respond with intention rather than reactivity. One of my favorite spiritual teachers, Pema Chodron, wrote “Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know.” Clearly I haven’t mastered my lesson yet, but I sure am working on it hard each and every time =)
So yes – there is a part of me tracking the news about COVID and wondering whether there will be another repeat of 2020. Yet there is no way I will allow it to be a moment of deja vu because I will take everything I learned and unlearned and gained and lost over the last 18 months and be ready to respond to the moment rather than react to it.
Stay safe y’all, and I hope to see you on your mat with us very very soon <3