I started writing this blogpost last Monday morning – over a week ago. I sat down at least 15 times over two days to write and each time I was stopped by “Mama I need a snack…” “How long until we can play Barbies?” “What’s taller – 40 people stacked on top of each other or 2 giraffes?” Yes, it is definitely summer-time with a 5 year old at home.
What Freida didn’t understand, though, is that I had a plan for the week – I needed to get everything organized for our July teacher training weekend, send out our monthly email blast, figure out subs for July and do a million other things. I had absolutely no childcare – my parents were out of town, our babysitter was on vacation, and Brian was out of town for work – but I had a calendar with many many things written on it and lots of stubborn determination!
In 40 Days to a Personal Revolution, my yoga teacher Baron Baptiste writes “Relax with what is.” And the “what is” part is critical – it’s not what you had planned for nor what you wish for. It asks you to relax with things exactly as they are. For the past several days, I had been doing the exact opposite by resisting what is. The reality is I am home alone with an extremely talkative and high energy five year old who wants my undivided attention. The more I try to resist that and stick with my to-do list, the more frustrated and irritable we both become. However once I stop and accept my situation exactly as it is, I see there are options. I see how I can spend my days playing and then work uninterrupted at night. I see how for one week, I can say no to things and ask other people to cover for me at the studio. I see how I can’t take class at the studio, but Freida and I can practice together at home. It’s interesting because as soon as I gave up my agenda for the week, I started actually getting things done.
I honestly used to hate this idea of “Relax with what is,” and I often still struggle with it. Why do I want to accept something if it’s not what I chose? But what I’m slowly learning is that acceptance is actually the most powerful way for me to transform a situation. When I can relax with what is, I make choices from a place of calm and clarity rather than reacting from a place of frustration and fear. If that isn’t personal power, I really don’t know what it is. And besides, a day spent in a marshmallow pit beats out getting out emails on-time any day <3